that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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