Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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