escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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