This is the prime rib incident all over again
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
