it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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