Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize