i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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