its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
