Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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