well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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