I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
