C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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