idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
