So drunk its hurt
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
