and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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