Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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