This dress was meant to end up on your floor
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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