I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
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