well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Fuck me I smell like cheese
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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