so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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