Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
oh god the rape fog is back!
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
