Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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