Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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