you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
