I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize