At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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