Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
