dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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