Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
love makes seman taste better
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
