I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I made him laugh his dick is mine
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
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