You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I'm always down for nudity.
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