3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I got inside last night via doggy door
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
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