So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
