i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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