Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
