how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize
