I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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