She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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