I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize
