apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize