Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
