i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
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