So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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