I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
