This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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