your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
