I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
