Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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