omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
