I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
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