oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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